Trending: Would you punch Mario Balotelli? Lance Armstrong ignores his daughter and sprinter falls down

Roberto Mancini is ready to unleash terrible fury on his increasingly unreliable striker Mario Balotelli, with a threat of violence that would shock a Victorian father.
Roberto Mancini has had enough. His title challenge is faltering, his expensive loafers are sick of having to tred uncultured turf at the Britannia Stadium et al and Mario Balotelli needs a smack round the mouth.
Hang on, is that what player discipline has come to these days?
Apparently so. With a malevolent glint in his eye and a fist raised in a threatening pose that screamed "this is what you'll get, pal" Mancini said: “If you played with me 10 years ago, I give to you every day maybe one punch in your head.”
He'd give it to him? How generous of him.
What has Mario done to deserve this?
Sure, he's petulant, loves giving the ball away cheaply, enjoys a scrap with his team mates, is prone to setting his house on fire, wears ill-advised t-shirts with firearms on them and, most worryingly of all, is now buddies with ultra-rebellious dad-rocker Noel Gallagher.
But doesn't that all make Mario a lovable scamp, a cheeky tearway, a decent back-up striker to Edin Dzeko?